samseng eles

| Wear Heart on Sleeve |

2011-05-26T06:03:00.001-07:00

baby, time faster gone.

here i am, watching you growing up.

listen to each and every silly stories told by you.

making jokes and having great laughs with you.

you making fun of me and me being sarcasm as ever.

baby, time faster gone.

it'll never be like this anymore.

you've grow up.

it's time to let you go.

just bare one thing in your little mind,

I'll always love you.

best friends.

love, nina.

| Moonlight |

2011-04-13T06:30:00.000-07:00

sweet? not too sweet. heyyyyaahh.

I think I fall in love again and again and again.

oh, I think I wanna marry you.

You can count on me, I promise I'll try my best.

If you had a lonely day, I'll be your entertainment.

If you're down, I promise I'll lift you up and support you from behind.

There's nothing like you, no one can be you.

you're perfect in your way.

i love you.

-nina merlissa-

| I missed the moments |

2011-04-06T05:50:00.000-07:00

I missed the moments when I was younger and don't understand the word busy, homeworks, study or examinations. Or even the times when I am less stressed and happy all the way with people that I loved all around me. Seconds with honest smiles and laughs on my face. I missed those time. Oh why oh why can't I feel the same way back?

I was doing my work when I started to review all the files in my computer. I found some old pictures that I have forgotten its ever happened. Then I started to cry, the silent happiness tears. How easy people forget things.

2007 - Pantai Batu Buruk, Terengganu

2008 - Kak Long's Reception

2009 - Randomness

2010 - Jaybee

| I Do Believe In Fairies |

2011-03-06T07:19:00.000-08:00

yes, i swim there all alone. pretty bored and saw ...

NO, I DON'T BELIEVE IN FAIRY. I DON'T, I DON'T

But I do believe in Faith.

I do believe in Charm.

And I do believe in Miracle.

I seriously do not believe in Fairy Tales neither.

Why?

Fairy Tales are just a big lie for kids.

Fairy Tales were created so little kids would have a dream.

No Fairy will help you.

You have to help yourself.

Who says Happy Ending will not happen?

Happy ending is not just in fairy tales.

You created the happy ending.

Yeah, I do believe in happy ending.

I do believe in Love At The First Sight.

It's a sign for you.

A sign that you have found the One.

But still, you must have know if they're the One.

I don't believe in Love After Marriage.

seriously, how did you know you will fall in love?

Well, i wanna get married to someone I know

and he's the one and only.

haha, this post is so useless, i dont know what to update.

blogging becomes boring now :(

| confession #1 |

2011-03-02T00:36:00.001-08:00

intervensi ended two days ago, alhamdulillah i go through it without cheating or complaining. this post might hurt many people but siapa yang buat dia lah terasa pedasnya.

ala, intervensi AJE

familiar with the words? yeeah, I freaking hate the words and people who said that. you think intervensi was so easy? It is like a second time final year examinations of Form 4s. Did you do your last final examinations very well? I guess not. Oh well, if it is so easy for you to say ' intervensi AJE ' why did you try so hard to get scope exam or even soalan bocor. or even worst, you get the question paper? Isn't that shows your own stupidity. Intervensi AJE pun nak skop and soalan bocor. whatthefuck? Intervensi AJE means the questions were easy and you can easily score the papers. But, maybe it means easy to score because you can easily get soalan bocor? I pity you people : ' (

claps to all people who are not arrogant enough to say those words (Y)

Kau dah study bolehlah, Aku belum.

Well hello, I spent my Chinese New Year holidays opened my books and did some revisions while you going out and have some party time. Oh hell yeah I did go out so many times and have the time of my life but still, I spend some times to study. Mind over matter. Done.

Have you studied? No? Great, let's failed together!

Failed together? err. I am thankful that I have such a nerd, bubbly and annoying friends that really influence me to study. Alyea and Hana never get bored of studying all the time. They are crazy aliens, I know. Priya Reyshma is a girl came from library of hell books. Her determination really inspired me. Though they are mad nerd but they are very talkative, insane and they love me :)

ninamerlissa

| Prosperity Gift |

2011-02-26T08:55:00.001-08:00

friends are like sun, they shine your world - inside and outside.

dear sunshines, kita dah kenal lamaaaaaa gila kan? each of us kenal tahun lain-lain tapi kita boleh rapat macam tuuu aje *petik jari tak menjadi*. you guys never failed to make me smile and laugh like never before every time we met. we had done crazy and inappropriate things together. and the fact that none of us can even stop each other from doing or say stupid stuffs! :D

I don't have any sweet words nor small (or big) speech to make. i just wanna say i love you guys so much. may Allah bless our friendship till the end of our breath. some people might say how lame and boring our friendship is (as we live far apart) but only we know what we had, what we felt and how this friendship affects us. how can they judge? ARE THEY EVEN OUR FRIENDS? they can go on with their thoughts while we enjoy all the happiness

A Friend is a Treasure

A friend is someone we turn to,

when our spirits need a lift.

A friend is someone we treasure,

for our friendship is a gift.

A friend is someone who fills our lives,

with beauty, joy and grace.

And make the world we live in,

a better and happier place

They're the ones you can go to
When you're in despair
The ones that'll help you
Even when you got gum in your hair!
They're the ones who'll laugh
And go laughing with you all through the night
The ones who'll help you
Help you with all their might
To have a good friend
You have to be one
So be nice to one another
So you can be friends forever
And that's how to be the best friend you can be.

-ninamerlissaalias

| The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live |

2011-02-08T05:49:00.000-08:00

i'm glad you made time to see me

how's life? tell me how's your family

i haven't seen them in a while

you've been good, busier than ever

we small talk, work and the weather

your guard is up and i know why

*Papa Americano*

*answer*

*Voice SMS*

Anon : Hi Nina, it's me. howwa you? *long pause* I miss you.

*click*

because the last time you saw me

is still burned in the back of your mind

you gave me rose, and

i left them there to die

*Papa Americano*

*answer*

*Voice SMS*

Anon : It's me again. I'm sorry. I don't have the guts to call you, to hear your voice. I miss you.

*click*

So this is me swallowing my pride

standing in front of you

saying I'm sorry for that night

and I'd go back to December all the time

*Papa Americano*

*answer*

*Voice SMS*

Anon : I want to talk to you but I know you will shout and mad at me again. I am a coward. To be honest, I never stop loving you.

*click*

It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you

wishing that I'd realized what I had when you were mine

I'd go back to December, turn around and make it alright

I go back to December all the time.

*Papa Americano*

*answer*

*oh er, it's a call*

Anon : Hi Nina, hmmm Lisa

Nina : Hello, J.

Anon : you still call me that name.

Nina : Apa yang you nak ha? I dont know what's your attention of sending me such a stupid, selfish voice messages that shows how arrogant and ridiculous and you make fun of yourself. go away. it has been 2 years. you should have forget about it.

Anon : but you haven't listen to..

Nina : I dont want to listen anything from anybody. especially from a big fat liar like you. dont ever dare calling me ever again or even send voice messages. leave me.

*click*

WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

nina merlissa

| world greatest history starts today |

2011-02-06T03:17:00.001-08:00

this is Mr. Kulat from Majalah Gila-Gila. reaaaaally nice to meet a real cartoonist :)

this is a response post for Azlina aka Decna.

not everybody in this world feel good about themselves. they wanted to be famous, to be outstanding and sparkle in darkness. in reality they're not and they know they cannot be. so, they live in fairy tales and created their own world.

as for this certain someone we're talking here, she's a wannabe famous-sexy-bitch. but, ehermm we both know how she looks like in reality (im not saying anything :p hehe). I sincerely pity her on her behavior and the way she choose to be the new 'she'. it must be reaaaaaally hard for her to keep track of 'every of her friends' and of course 'cousins'. hotsetaf lah katakan. we shall see how far she can go by acting and keep on lying to people. oh come on, she lives like 500m from my house aje kot. nak menipu beragak lah. if she wants to it to be a game, two can play it together. let's plan a trap shall we? ;)

nina merlissa

| double triple the prosperity |

2011-02-02T11:22:00.000-08:00

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR :)

this post is not about Chinese new year celebration atau sewaktu dengannya.

when I view my blog, I just realise how ugly, stupid and ridiculous this blog is. I was and still am immature. I reread my blog and I can see a girl that is still in her journey of finding herself. a girl that did not look at the bright side and in wide angle of her life. an unknown girl that feel that she's not love by anyone. a girl that I can describe as lost.

I remember picturing myself when i was still in primary school. I was so naive. I did not mixed with everybody, until now. I was one of the top students and I was famous for that. Other than I was the Head Prefect of IT and I have uncommon name that teachers loved. I did not go out on weekends. my social life was my schoolmates, my neighbours, my surroundings, my computer and hand phone. oh, how pathetic. I feel sorry for myself. When I get into high school, I have my first Indian friend. and then two Chinese friends. I try to mixed along. but i just can't. It has been four years. then I realise, my primary school taught me to be a stronger person than the people I know in high school, taught me to be more knowledgeable in common sense, taught me not to look down on poor people, taught me so many things that i can't imagine they will. And believe it or not, my little social life before is now sounds better than anyone else.

High school makes me a whole new person. High school makes me forget who I was. Where I came from. How to feel to be a Getho, a person that cannot be challenge, a person who never back off in any fights, a person that is always been look down by rich people but always be confident of themselves. I forgot how to be a child again. I forgot how to love and gain the loves. High school makes all our kindergarten dreams gone. no more out-of-the-box ideas and unthinkable actions that we used to do. I missed everything. but, i believe high school never ends.

the older I get, more confuse I am. I get to know so many people with different stories to be unfold. People that have different attitude that can be like and hated. I am so tired of this. Listening and to be listen is different thing. I want to sleep and forget. forget that yesterday ever happen and hoping that tomorrow is a fresh start without bad memories of yesterdays. I am tired. Tired of complaining and to be complaint by others. Tired of hating and to be hate by others. Tired of my own ego. Can I have my sleep now? A sleep so I can forget. Goodnight.

I sounded like I'm giving up on everything. well, sometimes I am.

nina merlissa

| Somehow, I am Proud |

2011-01-31T19:52:00.000-08:00

i am proud to call her, my new buddy.

can you guess? no? yes?

it's obvious. not.

i get close to her only this year.

i know it's only like a month, but i like her.

she's bubbly, confident and a pretty good singer.

can you guess again?

obvious kan?

it's Priya Reyshma!

this is awkward for me.

first of all, i am not perasan and i never admit anything.

hihi. this is Sabitah Reshma.

and she called me pretty.

which is i am not.

see the prove. :)

this is my four-years-old annoying best friend.

isn't she photogenic?

i am jealous.

blerghhh.

you know her. Hana Izzati.

p/s : i created her best quote. haha.

jeng jeng jeng.

meet and my longest and my

i-never-had-a-fight-with-her, and

i-never-want-to-fight-with-her, best friend.

she is always neutral between me and Hana.

cehhh, supernaturalwoman :))

Alyea A. Aziz.

isn't she beautiful?

last but not least,

this is the girl that,

i will never forget

i will always forgive

i will always love

i will put her first

she is myself, Nina Merlissa Alias.

i know i'm being selfish.

who cares?

my best friends don't.

with love, nina merlissa alias

| turns upside down |

2011-01-30T17:46:00.000-08:00

DO I CARE IF YOU CRY BECAUSE OF ME?

hell no.

okay, maybe i do.

but i don't pity you at all.

2011 has been nice to me for this one month. except for homeworks and bitchy suckers that i have. other than that, i'm cool. i have three boyfriends now. who cares about the others? for this past four weeks, i've been trying to look at things from the third view. the birds' view. apa apa view lah aku tak tahu mcm mana nak kata. i know things i did was wrong, but for me, there is no turning back. i wont take back my words, my actions or forgiveness. if you think i am mean, tell me directly. then i will tell you what i think about you. if you know me very well, i never do thing on purpose. i treat you bad not because you treat me bad, but because you are a bad friend. i keep my feelings to myself till i exploded with anger. that makes me treat you badly and for a revenge, i will not forgive you and never seek for anybody's forgiveness. im done.

nina merlissa

| everyday is a new story |

2011-01-13T07:12:00.000-08:00

i remembered the time when i was sitting on the balcony, counting the stars that surrounded the half-moon, listen to the sound of waves under my water chalet. i felt peace and calmness. the place i wanna be - a quiet place.

i remembered what i was thinking that time. my new year resolution. i'm pretty sure that everyone will say 'i wanna study hard for my spm' 'i wanna bla bla bla spm bla' but did you manage to get done with your last year's resolution ? idontthinkso.

i was thinking, i will do anything for me to be in that peaceful place again. to feel the nice feeling, like there is nothing that can worry you, no one can search for you, and you be part of the nature. part of where you came from. i promise myself that i will be there again.

for once, i thought, maybe i don't have to count the stars, to talk to the moon or watch the blue sea. i still can find my own peace in my beloved cosmopolitan city. that is, i won't care about other stuffs. i wont care about people that did not appreciate me. i wont care about people that hurts me. i wont care about people who lied and don't care about me. i wont give a damn about anything.

all i wanna do is care for myself, my family and my beloved favorite friends and boyfriend. this might be wrong, but you can try your luck to change my perspective ;)

nina merlissa

| i counts on things |

2010-12-13T00:04:00.001-08:00

Poo, i miss him. he died last year :(

I used to talk to cats. you know, like you are actually talking alone then you found something that's alive though not human and you tell them how you feel, your problems and stuffs. yeah, i choose cats.

but that was before. before i met someone who always be there for me, ALWAYS. 24 hours non-stop being the first person that pop in my mind every time. being the most supportive and positive-minded best boy friend ever. he never get bored of me. he shines my world so i can feel happy again. i don't have any sweet words to write, nor do i have a great poem to show. enough to say that i love him, with all my heart. and i know he will always know this.

ANWAR AHMAD < 3

with love, nina merlissa alias

| i'm alone, in this big world called Earth |

2010-12-10T03:45:00.001-08:00

i have a disease called Achluophobia.
well, it's not really a disease. it's a phobia.
afraid of dark places.
and even,
dim light places.

i admit that i never switch off the light when i sleep. i never go downstairs alone at midnight. i switch on all the light on my way to the kitchen at night. i never let my washroom's door open even in the day time. i locked my door everytime I'm in my room so no monster can kidnap me. i will scream all my life till someone get me on the couch if i overslept at the living room. i stay downstairs, switch on the lights and increase the volume of television if no one's in the house even during Maghrib time. i hate to have a rounding morning duty at school because the corridors are damn scary and I'm alone. and many many many others. well, you may do these when you were little. but i still do it, till now.

i often seen something i should not have. i think i have the sixth sense ;o

nina merlissa

| life sometimes is cruel |

2010-12-03T22:18:00.000-08:00

Hey Jude, dont be afraid

take a sad song, and make it better

remember to let her into your heart

then you can start to make it better

i love the song Hey Jude, especially masa nak study. it makes me feel comfortable :) well, currently i feel really sad. how is it to lost a friend? a friend that you have been together for quite a time, and suddenly she change and then slowly gone. people do change, so does her. and maybe me. maybe i should stop and go on with my life. she can go die.

Hey Jude, don't be afraid

you were made to go out and get her

the minute you let her under your skin

then you begin to make it better

but i can't. she meant a lot to me. she is one of the top people that i ever love in my life. sometimes i blame myself that things happen this way. sometimes i just blame her. but i believe, things happen for good. yeah, maybe this is a good thing. God, please show me the truth :(

And anytime you feel the pain,

hey Jude, refrain

don't carry the world upon your shoulders

for well you know it's a fool who plays it cool

by making his world a little colder

if Ali read this, he might say, ' Lisa, walau kehilangan kawan pun, Lisa tetap ada kehidupan. lagi ramai orang sayang Lisa. Lisa tak perlukan dia. bila masuk uni nanti Lisa akan dapat ramai kawan baru. percaya la cakap Ali ' haha. he talked a lot about life :) i just need to be strong. wait, i will tell her. honesty is all that we need right now.

nina merlissa

| Dear God, thank you |

2010-11-22T02:44:00.000-08:00

I can't give solutions to all of life's problems, doubts, or fears.

But I can listen to you, and together we will search for answers.

I can't change your past with all its heartache and pain, nor the future with its untold stories.

But I can be there now when you need me to care.

I can't keep your feet from stumbling.

I can only offer my hand that you may grasp it and not fall.

Your joys, triumphs, success, and happiness are not mine.

yet I can share them in your laughter.

Your decisions in life are not mine to make, nor to judge.

I can only support you, encourage you, and help you when you ask.

I can't keep your heart from breaking and hurting,

But I can cry with you and help you pick up the pieces and put them back in place.

I can't tell you who you are. I can only love you and be your friend.

nina merlissa

holiday #1

2010-11-20T22:18:00.000-08:00

Day Five

boring. yes, what a very boring five days of holidays. people start to go out with friends, but me? i did not go anywhere. maybe i did, but my mind was not there. spend some times playing facebook games. wtf i knoww -.- haaaaaaaaa, i cant wait till tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, and daysss after tomorrow.

p/s ; i think online shopping is kinda cool :D

10 day till the end of my socialize life.

tuttt tuttt tutttt

2010-11-19T06:31:00.000-08:00

my last post was 3 months ago! whoaaa :D
WELL, HELLO BLOG :)

2010-08-11T01:16:00.000-07:00

SHE'S BACK :D

do you really think that you can ditch me like that?

you're so wrong.

wait up, i'll pay my revenge

nm.

2010-07-19T03:45:00.000-07:00

"you still kawan i kan? "

thanks leya, thanks hana :))

- xxx, nina merlissa alias ahmad.

2010-07-09T08:38:00.000-07:00

since last Sunday, I've been listening to my old favorite song, the song that i gave to you. the song that i said, it suits the feelings i had for you. the only song i listened while i wait for your decision. the song that i listened to when you break my heart into pieces. the song that reminds me of you, and only you. and of course, i still feel sad whenever the song is played. i cant deny that your existence in my life has give me a big impact and i have to face it for the rest of my life.

somehow im still missing you, your smile and laugh, the best-friend-forever way you treated me :'(

2010-05-16T22:08:00.000-07:00

DEsCRiBE
The shoes you wore today: barefoot
Your hair: shoulder length
Your weakness: Sleeping in class
Your fears: darkness
One thing you'd like to achieve: exams exams exams

WHaT IS..
Your most overused phrase on messenger: hahahaha
Your thoughts first waking up: 'what time is it?'
Your current worry: examinations
Your plans tomorrow: School

Y0U PReFeR
Sunrise or sunset: sunset
Gore or horror: horror
Eastside or westside: both
Stripes or polka dots: none
Money or fame: money
Planes or trains: planes
Metal or hardcore: metal

D0 Y0U
Do you think you've been in love: :)
Want to get married: loved to
Like to take baths: what?
Like talking on the phone: Yeah
Like thunderstorms: depends
Play an instrument: wished to
Like reading: of course

FAVoRITES
Kind of fruit: anything can do
Music to fall asleep to: country side
Time of the day: nights
Number: 7
Thing to do right before bed: texting
Thing to say when you're mad: @#$%^&*^$#@!!
Horror movie: none
Colors: depends on my current mood

FUTURE
Age you hope to be married: i want to get married after i get my first sallary
Numbers & Names of Children: ;)
Where you want to go to college: for sure not in Malaysia.
What country would you most like to visit: rome

2010-05-06T01:32:00.000-07:00

when i look at you

i can see you hate me.

when i talk to you

i can see you are not listening

when i have a gossip

i can see you'll find me

when you have a problem

you never tell me anymore

when you are happy

you never share it with me